Many of us have been hurt at some stage in our lives. Whether it was by a friend, a partner, a family member or by a random stranger. It doesn’t matter if we were hurt knowingly or unknowingly, with words or with actions, being hurt hurts!
The problem is that when we are hurt by someone we know, the anger and resentment we feel afterwards can become just as damaging. It’s almost as though whatever it was that caused a wound, and all the energy and time we spend thinking about it and going over it again and again, is picking at the wound instead of letting it heal.
Feeling angry and upset when someone does something to hurt us is a pretty natural response and we might not feel as though they even deserve to be forgiven.
However if we let these feelings of anger stay with us, it is kind of like we are allowing that person to continue to hurt us. We become stuck in that moment, and cannot seem to move forwards.
Forgiveness is one of those words that is much easier said than felt. Sure, sometimes we forgive people easily, because what they did never really bothered us that much. Like when someone apologizes for bumping into you in the street. Other times we feel so or hard done by that we struggle letting go of the anger we feel.
When we hold on to feelings of anger and resentment they can grow into desires of revenge and hatred and these are emotions that ultimately do more damage to ourselves than to anyone else.
Forgiveness is one of the kindest gifts we can give to ourselves, because by forgiving another person, we are not necessarily forgetting or excusing what happened, we are just deciding to move on and no longer let it prevent us from feeling happy, loving and trusting of others.
Perhaps the person deserves to be forgiven and given another chance? After all we are all human, and we have all made mistakes in the past. It is likely that you have hurt someone else in some way, even if you were not aware of it at the time.
All situations are different, and whether or not you choose to continue being close to that person, is completely up to you.
But either way, learning to forgive them will help you let go of those negative emotions that have been holding you back, so that you can be free to move forward with an open heart.