Life can be a very stressful at times. There’s so much pressure put on us these days – from work, family and friends – it makes it hard to take the time to appreciate things and live in the moment. We spend so much time worrying, judging, critiquing, analysing and hurting and they're all pointless feelings and thoughts. When we can release ourselves from being controlled by our constant paranoid, irrational or negative thoughts we can be free from our negative feelings and then we'll be able to live in true peace and joy. True peace and joy comes from cultivating an inner calm within ourselves, which can definitely be hard I know. I used to get stressed out about so many things, most of which were nothing to stress out about at all. These are some of the lessons I’ve learnt over the years to finding your inner calm.
Live in the moment
Try to make an effort to really live in the moment and let go of all the dramas that may have happened during the week with work, family or friends. Don't stress about what is happening next week either. There is a difference between being prepared and organized to worrying about something that hasn't happened yet. Rather sit there and try and focus on the present moment. When we live in the past or the future we can miss out on the beauty of life that is happening right now.
Let go of control
We can’t control a lot of what happens in our life and for some people this bring on a lot of anxiety and stress. Though whilst we can’t control our external environment and how people will treat us or what they do, we can control how we chose to react and be. If something in your life isn’t going your way stop trying to control it, let it be and try to find some calm in the situation you face.
Appreciate what you have now
Focus on appreciating all things - even the things that might usually annoy you. Accept them and appreciate them because at least you know you're alive and that is an incredible thing. If you struggle with this, then sit down and write what you have in our life right now you can be thankful for. Perhaps it’s a loving partner, beautiful kids amazing friends or a roof over your head. Big or small you can always find something to be thankful for.
Remove negative feelings
Having negative feelings about someone or something disallows the flow of life and can make you feel angry, annoyed or upset and what's the point of that, as the only person it’s doing damage to is yourself. Every time you have a negative feeling, counteract that with finding something positive you can focus on. Shift your mindset away from the negativity, because the more attention you give it the bigger it will become.
The storm will pass
I have found in my life that when things become a bit too much, or if everything seems to be going wrong it’s because I’m being prepared for something better. Sometimes the struggles in our lives are there for a reason, to learn a lesson or to make some changes that need to be made. So if things in your life seem a little chaotic, see what changes you can make to find some more calm and remember that nothing is permanent, not even the bad.
Sometimes I find myself saying, "I am so stressed". Then I remember that stress is usually just an illusion of urgency and my perceived need to get something done at once and more often than not, get it done perfectly. What I sometimes forget is that stress kills passion. It suffocates creativity and it destroys your natural spark in everything you do. I always want to do more and be more so I can help you guys. I know that this is my calling and I want to constantly be able to add something positive to your lives in some way, but even I forget sometimes that we must put ourselves first or we are no good to anyone else. Remember it’s okay to take a break, a timeout if things get too much. No one is super human and we all need a break at some point. Sit down and think about what gives you some pure relaxation, perhaps it’s a holiday or maybe it’s something simple like taking a hot bath with a good book. So remember it’s okay take a break and take care of yourself. Because when you take care of yourself you are able to take better care of others.
Don’t take life too seriously
Have you ever seen a young kid stressed out and worried about what others think? No way. They're as happy as they come. Yes I know what you're going to say, they don't have anything to stress about. Though a lot of the time as adults we create the stress for ourselves. Do we really have a legitimate reason to be stressed every day? Always remember there is so much joy in life to be had, so rather than focusing on the bad, focus on the good.
So remember to take it easy on yourself. Don't take life too seriously and when all else fails, go and be a kid, chill out, have fun, laugh at nothing, lay in the sun, pick a flower or get amongst nature. Do whatever brings joy into your life and let yourself find that inner calm.